


the path i choose to walk

by Echo (Lyrecho)



Series: tomonari final remix [2]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, DiZ Is A Shitty Adult, Donald And Goofy Are Better Adults, Gen, Kids Being Kids But Suffering Through Adult Problems, Oneshot, Roxas And Riku Are Like Oil And Water, Tomonari Final Remix, Valid Teenage Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-21 00:48:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20684732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyrecho/pseuds/Echo
Summary: For the single year that encapsulated his whole existence, Roxas only followed where he was led.Now, with the chance to make his own decisions, freedom in his grasp, he steps forward into his future.|Tumblr||Twitter|





	the path i choose to walk

When Roxas awoke, it was all at once. There was no steady incline from sleep to wake – one moment all was black, and the next he’d head-butted Axel as he jerked up in his arms.

"Oof," Axel grunted, and staggered back a few steps. "Morning, princess." There was a surprised light in Axel’s eyes as he grinned down at him, and Roxas briefly wondered at the shadows that had sunken in beneath them, marring his friend’s face.

His first, most honest instinct was to scowl at Axel, had he _ still _ not learned how much he _ hated _ his stupid nicknames – but then his brain, at least half a mile behind the rest of him in the consciousness department, caught up to the current situation he found himself in, and then he couldn’t shove the man away from him fast enough.

Axel let out a cut-off yelp as Roxas – smaller and stockier, but still strong and fast and _ vicious _ – drove an elbow into his throat, wide open and vulnerable above him; pushed out of Axel’s arms and rolled into a ball to absorb the shock of the fall with a swift, double booted _ kick _.

He’d – he’d been in Twilight Town, hadn't he? With Hayner and Pence and Olette - but no, none of that had been real, had it? Just an illusion to keep him docile and placated, before they shredded his existence and fed the broken down remnants back into the original, to make _ him _ whole once again.

Roxas felt his lips twist into a snarl, and he didn’t even care if Axel thought the expression was directed at him – he had plenty of rage for his old friend, too. No need to be _ sparing _ with it.

Probably picking up on his mood, and his rising desire for violence, Axel eased slowly up into a standing position from where Roxas’ attack had knocked him down, hands cautiously raised in what could either be a gesture of surrender, or a way for Axel to summon bursts of fire faster.

"Well, can’t say I expected _ this _," Axel muttered, frowning slightly and looking at him with a tilted head.

"Expected _ what? _ " Roxas snapped, because his head was pounding and he could _ feel _ himself slowly acclimatising all the memories that Namine must have reinstalled inside his head and it _ hurt _ ; it burned and stabbed and _ screamed _ like nothing Roxas had ever felt before – even the terrifying, visceral sensation of being trapped, being crushed by tangible darkness, all the breath forced out of you, blood rushing to the surface and bones groaning in protest as they almost gave way beneath pressure could _ never _ match the pain he was feeling. An intimate, soul deep pain, as his own memories were as weapons against him.

"This hostility," Axel said. "You _ do _ know what I saved you from back there, right?" He frowned. "Or has Namine been messing with your head?" He stepped forward, and tugged Roxas’ face up by the chin, looked him directly in the face. "She did, didn’t she? Roxas – just how much do you remember?"

A flash of surprisingly brutal anger flared through him, and he jerked his away from where they were connected.

"Everything," he said, voice hollow, and noticed for the first time that he wasn’t in the clothes he had grown used to in Twilight Town, but the Organization cloak he had so come to loath. "I remember _ everything _."

* * *

The fight against the shooter, was, quite honestly, a blur. Riku never even managed to get an attack in, as far as he could recall between the flashing red lights of the bullets coming at him - it was all he could do to bring Soul Eater up in time to deflect them. And, after he'd recovered enough to gain his bearings, blinking away the violet-red afterimages the volleys of bullets burned into his retinas had created, it was just in time to see that the Nobody was gone - as if he'd never been there in the first place, only the lingering taste of darkness stroking the back of Riku's tongue and throat proof that he truly had been.

He felt his lips curl into a snarl. _ Damn _ the Organization. Every time he thought they had finally managed to gain some ground, finally managed to secure at least one little victory - the Nobodies appeared to kick him back into the dirt, point and laugh, and then vanish before he could even think of retaliating. It was frustrating like he couldn't believe, and his emotions were a mix of worry and annoyance as he raced down the halls to reach his original destination - Namine, and by extension, Sora.

But by the time he reached his destination, he was already too late.

They were gone, the room empty of anything but shattered glass, and Riku let out a yell of frustration as he yanked his hood down, pulling it away from his face as he ran a hand over his eyes. "Dammit," he snarled, and kicked out at a particularly large shard of what had once been Sora's pod that was lying by his feet.

"The Organization has them, then."

The voice came from behind Riku, echoing from the open doorway, and he didn't even bother to turn in acknowledgement.

"What do we do now, DiZ?" He snapped out. "What would they even _ want _ Sora for? It's not like he's going to help them."

He glared over his shoulder at DiZ as he said this, and the older man stepped further into the room, his one visible eye narrowing as he navigated through the glass. "Namine was taken also," he observed. "Likely, they will have her manipulate Sora through his memories, as was their original plan in Castle Oblivion."

Riku scoffed. "Oh, come on," he said. "They already tried that once, and it failed," he reminded DiZ. "And besides, Namine would never help the Organization."

"You are being naive!" DiZ's voice was sharp, cutting, and as he spoke he flung out one hand in a sharp gesture of agitation. "Think of it not in terms of how willing Namine is to aid her fellow Nobodies, but rather how desperate she is to not have Sora come to harm!" DiZ sighed, his eye closing briefly as he pinched the bridge of his nose, as if a headache had begun to form. "Namine may _ wish _ for the side of light to win against whatever the Organization is planning, but she is nothing if not practical. And while her unique creation makes her a very _ special _ Nobody, she still is exactly that, and is thus an inherently selfish creature. She wants to redeem herself for her actions in Castle Oblivion, and to that end has devoted herself to making Sora safe and whole." He fixed a burning glare on Riku. "So tell me, Riku - in what world would she not do as the Organization demands of her to keep the two of them safe?"

Fidgeting uneasily, trying not show just how uncertain those blunt words made him, Riku desperately tried to think of an answer to DiZ's question that would not condemn Namine - all the while making _ sure _ not to break eye-contact with him.

It was then, during that tense and ever lengthening silence, that Riku managed to - very faintly - pick up sounds coming from the floor, in the very centre of the room. And, as much as he hated to admit it; if it hadn't been for the uncomfortable quiet that echoed DiZ's words and presence, he may never have heard it.

May never have heard the soft, crystalline chinking of glass shifting against tile.

He jerked, eyes widening, and turned his gaze downward, searching.

"Can you hear that?" He asked DiZ distractedly, cutting off the questions that were likely forthcoming as to why he was acting as he was.

"...Hear what?" DiZ said finally, moving further into the room, giving a cursory glance to the floor Riku's sight was thoroughly roving over.

"Something's in the glass," Riku said grimly. "And it's alive - alive and moving."

DiZ blinked, before looking down with new interest, nudging glass into piles with his feet as he moved through the room. "Ah - Riku, here," he said, and crouched down, an urgency in his tone as he stood back up, hands cupped together; holding something.

Riku stared as he registered what rested in DiZ's grasp - that small cricket guy that had been with Sora when he travelled; Maleficent had mentioned him to Riku initially and later the King had elaborated more - his name was Jiminy, and he was some sort of record keeper for the history of the worlds, currently under the employ and care of Mickey's homeworld.

"What?" He said. "Jiminy - what is he doing here?" Guiltily, it occurred to him only now that he hadn't seen nor thought of Sora's fourth travelling companion, not since Namine had placed all of them in pods for safekeeping while they slept.

"Namine did say that he had often taken refuge within Sora's hood while they travelled," DiZ reminded him. "It was remiss of us not to even consider his presence." He stepped forward until he and Riku stood side by side, and in unison they looked down at Jiminy's somewhat worse for wear form.

"What do you think happened to him?" Riku asked, flicking a look up to gaze around the room, trying to build a picture of what could have _ possibly _ happened here - after all, the room had been kept empty except for pod and podium where Sora had rested and thus the only sign of a struggle was the glass scattered everywhere - hardly a telling clue, except perhaps for the fact that the glass the pod had been made of was thick and nigh unbreakable, meaning either magic or _ tremendous _force had been applied.

"Likely, he was discovered," DiZ said, still staring down at Jiminy, who was moving slightly and slowly, still mostly unconscious; dazed and probably hurting. "Whichever member of the Organization found their way here, they clearly only wanted Sora and Namine. It doesn't surprise me that they left Jiminy behind once they'd found him - it does, however, surprise me greatly that they left him alive."

"They probably thought they _ had _ killed him," Riku pointed out reasonably. "I mean, look at him. Just being thrown into some broken glass, or moving around in it, doesn't cause that kind of damage. It's more like he's been crushed."

DiZ hummed. "We should relocate," he said. "If we are to question Jiminy for whatever information he may offer us, we will need to have him healed, and I'm fairly certain neither of us hold the expertise needed to restore this damage." His one visible eye was piercing as it narrowed on Riku. "The Organization has already come here once, and though they gained their objective, that is no guarantee that they will not return. Twilight Town is no longer safe for us to remain in."

"Where will we go?" Riku said, one hand rising up to finger the thick material of his hood. Wherever it was they ended up moving to, he would more than likely have to keep his face hidden - unfortunately, Ansem's face was _ very _ \- entirely too much so for Riku to feel comfortable - recognisable.

Admittedly, not many people outside of the few remaining stragglers of Maleficent's 'inner circle' (i.e. her pawns) knew just _ what _ Ansem had looked like - or what Riku had looked like, but it was always, _ always _, better to be safe than sorry.

(Riku hated how he looked, how it was a constant reminder of the darkness that had taken root in his heart, the darkness he had allowed to bloom and flourish - all out of a selfish desire to keep up with Sora, to outpace Sora when his friend was growing so much in strength and wisdom - growing in leaps and bounds, leaving him behind when all throughout their lives it had forever been the other way. But mostly, the thing that disturbed him about the face he now wore wasn't how it was proof of just how far he had fallen - no, it was much more personal than that.

Sora, and Kairi - what would they think when they saw him like this, when they saw him wearing the body of the man - the darkness - that had hurt and taunted them so badly? _ How _ would they look at him? And would they look at all? Or would they avert their gazes, not wanting Riku to see the horror in their eyes while simultaneously not wanting to face the reality that would stare them in the face: their friend, a monster?

A small voice in the back of his head that sounded almost disturbingly like Sora whispered that he was being an idiot, that the both of them loved him for his heart, not his face, which was stupid anyway - but he silenced it viciously.)

It was as DiZ was humming thoughtfully, still looking over Jiminy while gently using one finger to inspect the movement range of the cricket's limbs, that the last voice Riku had ever expected to hear again spoke up from the doorway behind him - and it was only that very surprise that kept him from calling for Soul Eater.

"We need to go to Hollow Bastion," Roxas said, and the fury on his face - while controlled - was pretty much entirely directed at Riku, whose hands twitched with the desire to arm himself from the attack he was sure was coming as he whirled to face his best friend's Nobody.

"Roxas," DiZ said, and his voice was stern. "What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing _ awake _, you mean?" Nothing of Roxas' features truly resembled Sora's, with the exception of his eyes - but just like their identical counterparts, those eyes were very much the window to Roxas' soul, and it was strangely chilling to see those eyes, so familiar, filled with such rage and hate, placed on a face twisted in such an ugly sneer.

DiZ sighed, closing his eyes briefly. "Namine," he said, in an exasperated manner, as if she was the answer to everything and the world was worse off for it. "She woke you, I suppose?"

"And returned my memories," Roxas said - evidently furious at them beyond belief, but apparently willing to cooperate, at least for the time being. "I suppose I should thank her, even if she _ was _ the one who took them from me in the first place." Even if the words themselves were kind, his tone was acidly sarcastic.

“But…why are you _ here _?” Riku tried to understand. “Why would you come back here? Axel –”

“Axel isn’t here,” Roxas said bluntly. “When I told him I was coming back here he left. And I’m here because I want to be.”

“And why do you want to be?” DiZ said, his tone suspicious. “Your attitude makes it hard for me to believe you would come into our company willingly.”

“Well, that _ would _ be a change, now wouldn’t it?” Roxas said. “And I’m here to help – sort of. I’m not helping _ you _. I’m helping Sora, and Namine.” He crossed his arms over his chest as he said that, staring them both down defiantly, never mind that he was about half of Riku’s current height. “Sora has friends in Hollow Bastion that can help Jiminy –” he jerked his chin at the cricket still moving feebly in DiZ’s grasp “– and could probably help with hunting down wherever the World That Never Was is.”

Riku gritted his teeth. Nope, even when awake, he still didn’t like Roxas. “You’re a Nobody,” he said. “And Namine gave you your memory back. You should _ know _ where to find the World That Never Was.”

Roxas shrugged. “Namine only found it before because I knew where it was,” he said, “but the location isn’t fixed. Once she wiped my memory and you guys held me _ captive _ , there was no way I’d ever be able to get back there without being _ escorted _ there – that’s a fact, one that even restoring my memories can’t change.”

Riku closed his eyes briefly, a headache beginning to pound at his temples. “Of course it can’t,” he muttered, before opening his eyes. “Well, then, why are you here?”

Roxas scowled at him. “Like I said, I’m here to help.”

A bitter, short laugh escaped Riku. "Sure you are," he said. "When have _ you _ ever helped _ anything? _"

He was, perhaps, being unfair to Roxas - but dammit, he was _ angry _ , and he had every right to be. It should have been over, Maleficent was gone, _ Ansem _ was gone, and it _ should have been over _ . And yet, somehow, it wasn't and it was Sora - _ Sora _ , who didn't deserve any of... _ this _, of the misfortune Riku's stupidity had brought upon his best friends - who was suffering for it.

And Roxas was just the living, breathing embodiment of that fact - of Riku's failure.

Something flashed through Roxas' eyes, blue and so like Sora's, at those words, but beyond a tightening of his jaw, he didn't react at all. "I'm _ trying _ to be civil," he said quietly. "And _ I've _ never done anything to _ you _ , so the least you could do is _ attempt _ to extend that same courtesy."

Riku had to admit that was a fair point, as much as he disliked it - but before he could voice his (reluctant, grudging) agreement, DiZ - who had been standing to the side, watching closely and observing their conversation silently - spoke up.

"How would you know of Sora's friends in Hollow Bastion?" He asked. "Just what did that girl slip into your head?"

Roxas shrugged. "Pretty much whatever she could, or anything she thought was important, at least," he said. "Or, that's what it _ feels _ like." The words were accented with a wince. "I've got all of my own memories back, but I've also got a whole bunch of Sora's - I think she was trying to make me understand what you were trying to do, and, well, it sort of worked." A vicious grin. "I understand that whenever we get Sora back, he's not going to be very, uh, how should I put this? _ Happy _ with you."

Well, no - of course not, Riku knew that, accepted that, but something about the way Roxas all but sneered it... He narrowed his eyes. "What are you saying?" He asked suspiciously, only to be ignored, and then cut-off - by DiZ.

"Now is not the time!" He snapped, and both Riku and Roxas flinched to attention at his sharp, cutting tone. "You must leave for Hollow Bastion at once. There is no telling how much time Jiminy will have left without proper medical care."

"What about you?" Riku broke in. "Don't think I didn't notice you exclude yourself from our travel party, old man. Where - _ exactly _ \- are you going?"

DiZ's gaze as he stared at him was indecipherable. "You will take Goofy and Donald with you," he said finally. "Even without Namine, I can manage awakening them, and they will likely be of great help to the two of you." Stepping forward, he handed Jiminy to Roxas as he brushed past the Nobody without so much as a glance, moving out into the hall where the pods of Sora's friends rested.

Roxas glared at DiZ as the man stepped past him, but the moment he was out of sight, the Nobody had switched a wild-eyed, pale stare to the small and broken body now lying limp in the palm of his hand.

"Um," he said, and it was almost painful how easy it was to see that he really _ was _ not even a full year old, the confusion and naive innocence apparent in his voice and manner not fitting with the venom he had shown when he'd first entered the room.

"C'mon," Riku sighed. "DiZ is right. We need to move, and fast."

* * *

Goofy kept sending worried glances behind them, in the direction of the seats behind the controls of the gummi ship, where Roxas and Riku sat, bickering quietly with one another.

“Focus,” Donald snapped at him, as he looked back for the third time in as many minutes. “As long as they’re not actually killing each other, they’re fine.”

Goofy turned to him, a worried look in his eyes. “Gee, you really think so?” He asked.

No, Donald didn’t, actually. He was still absolutely confused by what they had been told when they’d awoken from a sleep he didn’t remember entering – the last thing he remembered was following after Sora when the boy had taken off after Pluto with a shout; he’d been told that was to be expected, as Namine (another blank in his mind) had messed with his memory.

He didn’t understand why, exactly, Riku acted more like the boy Sora had told them about but _ looked _ like Ansem, or why the boy with Sora’s eyes – Roxas, whom they called Sora’s ‘Nobody,’ (whatever that was) knew both he and Goofy so well. So no, he didn’t think it was okay or ‘fine’ that the two people who actually knew what was going on were at each other’s throats, regardless of whether or not they had resorted to violence yet – but for right now, adding themselves into the mix wouldn’t be good for anyone. If Sora had been one of the kids they were dealing with, then – maybe. He knew them, respected them, and could appreciate that they gave good advice; but Riku and Roxas were different, not just in that they didn’t know them, but in the fact that they had vastly different temperaments to Sora. If either Donald or Goofy tried to interject, it would just be seen as unwelcome interference, and, mortal enemies or not, the two boys would band together against them. It was basic psychology – the ‘us vs. them’ mentality of children against adults.

“If I didn’t think so, I wouldn’t say so,” Donald said with his arms crossed, rather than divulge any of his thoughts to his long-time friend, wanting him to focus on keeping their course straight. “But this ship _ does _ run on happy faces, you know!” He yelled over his shoulder, ignoring the burning glares he could feel fixate on the back of his chair as the boys turned their ire towards him.

Goofy let out a small chuckle, and turned his attention to the sonar screen. “Not many Heartless ships,” he said. “I’m not complaining, because we need to get Jiminy help as soon as possible, but…doesn’t it seem a bit weird to you?”

Donald shrugged. “We’ve been unconscious for a year,” he reminded his friend. “And before that, Sora and the King had locked the door to darkness. This amount of Heartless could be perfectly normal.”

“No,” Riku spoke up then, from directly behind Donald, a frown in his voice as he peered down at the readings over Donald’s shoulder, who yelped at his sudden appearance. “This isn’t normal at all.”

“What do you think you’re doing?” Donald shook a fist at Riku. “No standing while in transit! Go sit back down and strap yourself in!”

Donald couldn’t really tell, as most of Riku’s face was shadowed by the hood he wore and he was tall enough that he towered over Donald, but he thought that the kid might have rolled his eyes.

“There should be more Heartless,” Riku said. “I don’t use a gummi ship to travel, so I don’t know anything about Heartless _ ships _, but I can tell you that the amount of Heartless in the lanes between the worlds hasn’t really decreased any – not many people travel from other worlds, after all.”

“So… what?” Roxas’ voice echoed up from behind them, and when Donald glanced back, he was reclining lazily in his chair, his body slumped in a position that was eerily reminiscent of how Sora lounged about the ship when he wasn’t the one driving or in the navigator’s seat. Donald froze as this thought hit him, and as if sensing his eyes on him, Roxas flicked a look his way, meeting his eyes directly before going pale and staring down at the floor instead. “There would only be less Heartless if someone was getting rid of them is basically what you’re saying, right? And… isn’t that a _ good _ thing? Less Heartless to worry about, I mean?” His voice was quieter now, that earlier carelessness gone from his tone – his body language as well, all of it, becoming subdued.

Riku gave him a brief look over his shoulder as if taking in the sudden mood shift Roxas had undergone, before summarily dismissing both it and him. “Not necessarily,” he said. “I mean, the Organization used to send you on extermination missions, right? In fact, most of what you did were extermination missions.” His voice sharpened. “Do you know why?”

“Oh, how could I forget, you’re my own personal stalker,” Roxas muttered. “No, I don’t know why. I didn’t question it, and I didn’t care. And besides, it’s not like I was doing anything _ wrong _. In what world is killing Heartless a bad thing?”

As Goofy sighed, and Riku’s body tensed, as if bracing for another round of arguing with Roxas, Donald turned that information over in his mind. One of the first things mentioned briefly (and then not explained) upon his awakening was this ‘Organization,’ a group formed of whatever these Nobodies were, and they were the ones that had taken Sora while they slept. That was all he knew about them so far – Riku had promised a more in-depth explanation at a later date, but they hadn’t had the time to talk in those first, frantic moments of awareness. Jiminy was gravely injured, and Sora was gone, but there was no time to get to the ‘whys’ of the situation – not when whatever the Ansem look-alike that had turned out to be Riku (and Donald _ was _ sorry for the thunder spell that even now had Riku’s hair in a static frizz) called the Organization could be back at any minute, and they definitely did not want to chance that.

_ Just get to Hollow Bastion _ , Donald told himself, leaning back over the control panel to keep a close eye on their soundings – even if there weren’t very _ many _ Heartless ships, that didn’t mean that the few there were wouldn’t attack – and doing his level best not to let the stare down between Riku and Roxas drive him to insanity. _ Once we’re there – then we plan _.


End file.
